Once a month, I have started something fun with my mum, which has completely changed my life! It’s something I have struggled to do for years, however, with the help and guidance of my team and my mum, I have been able to achieve a big goal in my life and I am forever thankful for it! Find out what it is right here!
Recently, I’ve been reading and hearing about what people were doing five years ago! The time when we first ever went into lockdown in the UK! For me, it was a very confusing time, as I came to learn what COVID even was after being in hospital for so long! There so, I thought I would share my COVID story with you lovelies!
Bedtime is an odd time of the day for me! I am someone who comes alive at night and I often forget the time and end up staying awake for most of it. This leads to a lot of suffering the next day! However, I’ve made a lot of changes recently and I thought I would share my new nightly routine with you!
After months of battling many chronic health problems, I’ve decided that the pain they cause is not going to threaten my life anymore. I will continue to battle them but in my own way that doesn’t cause me to fear literally loosing my life over. Find out why I decided to make that choice and how I truly feel about it right here!
Ever felt like you are at a stage in your life where you can’t change anything? Well, that’s not the case, as you are never too old, young or experienced to make a better difference to your life. Last month, my mum proved to me just that and I wanted to share her story, which I think is really inspiration to us all!
When we approach the end of another month, I often think about what has happened recently. What am I proud of? What changes have been made? How has this month been different? In our family, we have had some huge changes. Sad ones in fact. Yet, we have also become closer in other ways.
With my ED, anxiety disorder and autism having been put through their paces a bit, I felt like I was going backwards a lot. Until my therapist pointed out the small changes I have made that will lead to even more positive moments.
Although I haven’t handle the pacing fully yet, I’ve been able to make big dents in it. I no longer time the amount of time I am out, meaning I can come in earlier if I want to or later now. I don’t walk up and down stairs as soon as I get out of bed now, instead, I get everything ready the night before. I’ve taken better care of myself and how I present who I am. I socialised more. I am so excited for upcoming life events! I’ve even tackled foods that I’ve struggled with.
October is known for being the spooky month, but for me, it’s been a refreshing month. Times have been shared that I didn’t think I would do this year. I’ve been able to embrace and explore more of the old me again. I’ve gotten closer to my mum, if that was even possible, and the neighbours we adore.
Removing small parts of life that have left me down has helped and my therapist is a magical person for it. She has even got me to sleep more, which is something I have struggled to do for years. Plus, the group I am with say that I am a lot more positive. Just not about rubbish TV aha!
It’s nice to be working with and alongside people who know the struggle. Speaking openly to my mum recently I stated that I sometimes feel people think I should have finished the race now. Yet, unfortunately that isn’t the case and probably never will be. I was told quite a few times that my recovery will probably never be fully done, and whilst sad, I am learning to live my life to the fullest as much as I can. Slow and steady wins the race has always been my motto from the start and I live by it.
Spooky stuff and seasons come and go. The cobwebs are shaken out and off. Although they come back, they can easily be battled through again. Something I am working hard on doing in my own life, no matter how long it takes. Bring on November and December! This is my time to become a fairy light and shine!
Joey X
During the autumn months, I find it is the perfect time to simply pause. Sometimes, with the rush of the summer holidays and back to school themes that come at this time of year, it seems like everything is going at one hundred miles per hour. But it doesn’t have to be that way.
About a month ago, I found myself getting really anxious. It was causing me to do and feel things I didn’t want to feel, mentally and physically. I decided a change needed to happen. Therefore, when I was on a walk with my mum, I told her I had to pause on all the changes.
In the past year, we have both been faced with a lot. My brother moved back in, we sadly had a number of deaths in the family, holidays happened and then stress occurred upon coming home, work changed, health matters were raised and it was a lot. Plus, with my anorexia and anxiety disorder, I just felt like I was going to have a breakdown.
Pausing doesn’t mean failure. In fact, choosing to take a moment and to focus on your health is brilliant. Rest is vital. Physically and mentally. Often, at around 8 or 8:30pm each night, I will go upstairs and just spend time on my own. Listening to podcasts. Reading. Scrolling on websites that calm me down or watching something that brings me joy. Christmas videos are a good choice at the moment. Even sleeping.
I used to hate the idea of it. My anorexia told me that I was lazy and I would stay up until 10pm, which was when I was allowed to go to bed in hospital, because that was when it allowed me to see it was okay. Yet, I have changed that now. I don’t follow the hospital rules and if I want to go and lay on my bed, then I will.
Rolling into the middle of November, when the months get colder, I am here to say, STOP. PAUSE. RELAX. Do what you want to do and don’t worry about others. If you want to eat cereal for dinner, do it! If you want to spend all day in bed, do it! If you want to put on your coat and go for a walk listening to a podcast, do it! Do what makes you happy and embrace it. Hibernate if you would like to lovely. I know my mum would probably like to!
Whatever brings a smile to your face, accept it lovely and be happy. Sometimes it takes just one moment and it can bring a whole host of differences. Life is too short as it is, so don’t go racing ahead if you don’t have to. Like a VHS, simply hit pause and allow it to stop for a bit. You will be so happy that you did.
Joey X