It might be a bit odd to write a post like this with my ED, however, I was inspired by the brilliant Table Manners podcast. Full of delicious last delights, this meal would be my final one before my death or placement on to a desert island. I would try hard to tell my ED to go away to enjoy these beautifully coursed dishes…

Good Morning Lovelies, 

I’ve been inspired by podcasts recently when it comes to my writing! I’ve found discussions are often built through what we hear and over the years I have loved learning about the last meals people would have. This inspiration comes from Jessie Ware’s Table Manners podcast, where she asks guests what their last meals would be. 

Although I suffer from anorexia, I often think about what my last meal on earth would be. Would I let the voice in my head stop me if I knew tomorrow wouldn’t come? If I was being shipped off to a dessert island for months? I hope that for just that final meal I could get it to shut up. Because there are final meals that I want to enjoy! 

There so, taking inspiration from one of the best food podcasts around, here is the final meal I would have…

Starter: Brussels Pate on Toast, with a side of Garlic Doughballs: God, I used to love pate on toast when I was growing up. I can even recall having it when I was ill. If we went out for any meals, this would always be my option, until garlic doughballs were introduced. As it’s my last meal, I am going to go with both options. 

Main Meal: The Goat Pub’s Classic Lasagne, with a side of Triple Cooked Thick Chips, or My Mum’s Christmas Dinner: Mixing my Italian and British sides, I would have to have the classic lasagne dish that the previous owners at my local pub used to make. It was thick, juicy and able to be enjoyed with just a fork. The chips on the side were used to mop up the left over bolognaise. I’ve never had a lasagne like it since and I think that adds to why I am scared of it, as it has very good memories associated with it. Something similar to my other option, which is my mum’s Christmas dinner. Coming downstairs, smelling the turkey cooking, just means it holds a very special place in my heart. If it was the last main I ever had, I would be very happy. 

Dessert: Apple and Rhubarb Crumble, with Custard and a side of Iced/Glazed Doughnuts: Crumble is a staple in my house. Honestly, put a bowl of it in front of my brother Gio and it will be gone in seconds. Every part of my life has had crumble associated with it. Growing up and having it on a Sunday after our roast dinner. Challenging myself to a bowl of it in and out of hospital. Living off the Frankie and Benny’s fantastic version of it. This crumble with custard is just immense. However, I can’t go down without also having some iced or glazed doughnuts, the ultimate sweet delights to me.

Drink: Sugar Free Still Vimto: I’ve never really thought about what drinks I love the most. Currently, due to my illness, I fear fizzy drinks and alcohol. Both make my anxiety rise too. If I wasn’t, I would probably have said Dr Pepper or an ice cold Disaronno on the rocks with a dash of coke. However, I think I’m going to have to go with the drink that saves me daily. It’s something I have learnt to enjoy during my illness and I just love it. So, I’m going to have to have a big, BIG, bottle of Sugar Free Vimto!  

Writing this was really hard for me. I wished throughout that I was able to eat these foods now. Yet, I’ve got a dickhead voice in my head stopping me. However, the memories I have with these foods makes me smile, even as I am, as I can recall good times aplenty with them. This is why they have made the list. Not just for the ingredients, the tastes or the overall meal, but for the memory they hold overall. That’s what I will go down with. After eating all of this of course! 

Joey X